QOTD: Andrea Grimes on what men can do

From I Made a Joke About Guns and a Man Threatened to Assault Me at RH Reality Check:

I don’t need men to individually and personally step up to protect me. I need them to collect their fellow dudes and actively work, every day, to end widespread cultural misogyny and to improve the lives of non-cisgender-dude people the world over.

Good dudes of the world, please hear me out: Not actively being a sexist shitbag as an individual is not enough. Because somewhere, somehow, the guys who dedicated themselves to harassing me—many of them under their real names on Facebook—have brothers, dads, uncles, golf buddies, tennis partners, co-workers, favorite bartenders, and an entire universe of dude friends and acquaintances, all of whom have failed to make it clear, either through their words or their actions, that this kind of behavior is not OK.

Hat-tip to friend-with-locked-account on Twitter.

When someone brings up sexism (or racism, or any form of oppression) the response is so frequently personal: “Well I’m certainly not sexist (or racist, etc)! How dare you call me sexist! You’re the real problem here!”

The problem about pervasive, ingrained prejudices and systems of power is they’re like the Force: invisible, inside all of us,* binding us together. This makes it easy to brush off: “Look, he didn’t call you a bitchslutwhore, so you must be reading the sexism into his statements!”

But sometimes sexism really, really isn’t invisible, and the least you can do, dudes, is challenge it when it’s right in front of you.


*The Star Wars expanded universe ysalamiri can shove off.

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